. IV .
“I was too late,” Joseph muttered to no one in particular. He was sitting at Rogue’s bedside in the infirmary, holding one of her cold hands in his. Beside him Xavier leant over, patting his shoulder comfortingly.
“You did what you could,” he replied soothingly.
“It wasn’t enough,” Joseph protested. “If I’d come but a moment sooner…”
“But you didn’t,” Hank interjected matter-of-factly from the opposite side of the bed, eyes scoring over the clipboard in his hands. “Don’t judge yourself too harshly, Joseph. It seems likely that your timely intrusion saved us from a lot more than you realize.” He paused, looking over at Remy, who’d been sitting to one side with a pale, drawn expression on his face. “And you, my friend, should be resting right now,” Hank told him archly.
“You t’ink I’m gonna leave her, after everyt’ing de fille’s been through, Henri?” Remy’s brow was creased but his eyes were on Joseph. “You’re mistaken. I’m not leavin’ an’ I’m not sleepin’ till she wakes up.”
All present knew that it was no use trying to convince him otherwise. Hank merely pursed up his lips and turned aside. Sage, standing at the end of the bed, looked no better off than Remy did. She had barely spoken since the incident in the War Room, but for some reason Hank had been unable to fathom, she had tagged along into the infirmary and no one had bothered to stop her.
“I made a mistake,” she muttered half to herself but loud enough for the others to hear. It was the first time she had said anything of length since leaving the War Room. “I thought that by teaching Rogue to control her powers, the psyches in her head would be pushed back. But the weakening of the Carol Danvers persona only served to give Irene Adler sufficient leeway to resurface. I should have known.”
“Tessa,” Xavier put in softly. “I don’t think any of us could have foreseen today’s events.”
“I should have been able to,” Sage persisted quietly. “I’ve studied Rogue for the better part of a year, catalogued every facet of her genome, her physiology and her mind. I should have seen that Irene Adler’s psyche was stronger than I had supposed.”
“I think Irene Adler’s personality works in more mysterious ways than we can account for,” Xavier admitted dryly. “It seems her purpose in being imprinted by Rogue was highly focused and singular.” He looked up at the assembled X-Men. “Don’t forget that Rogue imprinted her on the point of death. We have no idea what such an absorption entails, or how deep the effects of it may run. You did your best for the girl, Tessa. But I’m afraid that Rogue is not as simple to predict as we feared she was.”
“So that is what happened,” Joseph murmured. “Rogue imprinted Destiny while she died. That is why Destiny said that the imprint had run deeper than she had thought.”
“Destiny said that?” Xavier spoke up sharply.
“Yes,” Joseph nodded slowly, never taking his eyes away from Rogue’s sleeping face. Xavier scrutinized him, head cocked to one side.
“Back in the War Room, you said that Destiny couldn’t remember, Joseph. What did you mean by that?”
“What I said. That Destiny can’t remember any of her past life. She can’t remember what she wrote down in her Diaries. And she can’t remember why she allowed Rogue to imprint her either.”
“I t’ink de reason why is fairly obvious,” Remy muttered coldly.
“No,” Joseph glared up at him. “At first I thought this was what Destiny intended to use Rogue for. But even Destiny herself seems uncertain as to the true purpose of Rogue.” And me as well, he thought to himself bitterly. He sighed and held Rogue’s hand tighter. “All she knows is that Rogue imprinted her too deeply. All Irene Adler’s powers, all her memories are housed inside Rogue herself. The Irene Adler that exists now is only a shadow of her former existence. She is an X-Ternal – she is immortal and will live forever – but she is blind, not only physically, but also to her past and to her future.”
“Both of which Rogue has stolen,” Xavier finished grimly. He looked down at the unconscious Southerner in sudden sympathy. Inside her was a depth of pain that not even Rogue herself had fully tasted yet. It was locked too deep inside her. And when it surfaced, how would she ever be able to cope with the sins of the victim as well as those of the aggressor?
“Dis crazy,” Remy mumbled, his mouth twisted into a grimace. “You mean t’ tell me dat de only way to discover Destiny’s motivation is to force Rogue to recover it herself? Dat’ll kill her Professor. De fille’s been through enough as it is already. We got to let her be!”
“But if we do then how to we stop Destiny?” Joseph murmured, not looking at him. “How do we recover the meaning of the prophecies?”
“None o’ dat matters, don’ you get it?!” Remy suddenly burst, eyes burning. “What matters is where dis all began. Why de hell did Irene kill herself? Why did she feel it was so necessary to have herself imprinted by Rogue? Dis has got everyt’ing t’ do wit’ her, not Rogue.”
“Destiny is inside Rogue!” Joseph retorted vehemently. “There is no other way to find out the truth except through her!” He quieted, jaw tightening as he looked back down at her. “And I came here to stop her from becoming like her. Like Destiny. But I was too late. She’s imprinted all of the Seven now. Now Rogue is the Seven. Everything that was apportioned to the Seven now rests upon her shoulders.”
“And if that is the case,” Xavier began grimly, steepling his fingers in front of his face, “then Rogue also has all the powers of the Seven. And that makes her a very dangerous person indeed.”
“I know what you’re tryin’ t’ do. You want her t’ find out de truth. You want Xavier and Jean and Sage and God knows who else to mindscrape her. But I ain’t gonna let you. Can’t you see de truth will kill her? If she remembers, she’ll never be able t’ live with it.”
“You’re wrong, Gambit. Rogue’s an innocent in this. We must do everything in our power to protect her. But we have to find out the truth. If we don’t find out why Destiny really had herself imprinted, then Rogue will never be able to stop herself from becoming the most dangerous enemy the world has ever faced.”
Rogue fluttered her eyes open, hearing the two familiar voices conversing above her. In the artificial light, the first face that became apparent to her was that of a silver-haired man she had thought long gone from her life.
“Joe?”
Above her, Joseph’s eyes shifted down to rest upon hers.
“Rogue! Thank God you’re still with us…!” His exclamation was one of both joy and relief.
“It really is you,” she murmured, blinking at the unfamiliar light. Her eyes hurt, but otherwise the headaches had gone. “But Ah thought…”
“Shh,” he whispered back comfortingly, squeezing her hand. “You’re all right now. But you mustn’t strain yourself. You’ve been through a lot, Rogue.” He paused, half-frowned, and looked over her and across the bed at some point in space. “I’ll leave you now,” he finished quietly.
Her eyes were becoming more accustomed to the light. Turning her head slightly to her right, she saw Remy standing beside her, his red eyes narrowed as he looked upon Joseph.
“No, Joe, don’t go,” she began, turning back to the other man. “Why are you here? There’s so much I need to ask you…”
“Later,” he insisted, dropping her hand and taking a step backward. “You mustn’t be troubled now. We’ll talk about this later, Rogue, I promise.”
He left, passing Remy one last guarded look. Once he was gone, Remy scooped up her hand in his tenderly.
“How are you feelin’?” he asked her gently.
“Woozy,” she admitted slowly. She swivelled her head to gaze up at him, her expression suddenly grave. “Ah heard what you said, Remy. What did you mean about me rememberin’? An’ about me learnin’ the truth?”
“Rogue,” he began uncomfortably, “Joe was right. It’s probably best we don’ talk ‘bout dis right now…”
“Dammit, Remy, Ah ain’t no invalid,” she retorted sharply. “An’ Ah ain’t stupid either. So stop treatin’ me like Ah am!”
There was hesitation on his face as he regarded her. How could he tell her what she had done in the War Room that afternoon? He knew how she would react. He knew the guilt and pain knowing the truth would put her through.
“Rogue, I don’t know how to say dis…” he began, only to falter off again. She saw the conflict in his eyes and her face softened.
“Remy, it’s okay. You can tell me.” She paused, her gaze wandering towards the ceiling. “Ah know, y’see,” she continued in a low, rueful voice. “She used me. Irene used me, an’ Ah was all just a pawn in her game from the very start.”
Remy remained silent for a long moment. Then he turned, drew up a chair and settled in it heavily. It was a long while before he raised his eyes to hers again.
“Then you know what happened? In de War Room, I mean?”
She sighed. “No; not all of it. All Ah remember, Ah was in the bathroom and suddenly she was there. Inside me. Tellin’ me t’ touch Cable, that he was the only one left. And it all fell into place. Ah knew then. Ah just knew.” She turned her head away, trying desperately not to cry. “I’ve imprinted all of the Seven, haven’t Ah? She made me do it, she made me touch Havok and Bishop and even the Professor, and when Ah woke up Ah never remembered. That’s what makes me dangerous, isn’t it? Because she’s inside me, and the only way t’ stop her is t’ stop me.” She broke off, her voice suddenly trembling. At the distress in her words Remy took her hand again, his grip strong, reassuring. “Non,” he spoke firmly, “I won’t let dem hurt you, chere. They want you, they’ll have to go through me first.”
She looked at him again, tears suddenly smarting her eyes.
“Back last
year, when we were in Nawlins… When we were tryin’ t’ patch things up, y’ said
t’ me, ‘what if we we’re wicked?’” She closed her eyes briefly before opening
them again. “What if Ah am wicked,
Remy? Ah have that potential now, don’t
Ah? Ah could end up hurtin’ you, Remy,
and all of the others!”
His jaw tensed. “You’re no
more wicked den me or any other person in dis mansion,” he spoke after a
moment. She bit her lip. That wasn’t what she wanted to hear. The visions she had had, of him and the
terrible power he possessed, of his potential to become as his father had… A
potential that she alone held the key to, that she could either nurture or
destroy by a single action… She shook her head, her eyes suddenly wild.
“No, no, Remy…Don’t say that… You don’t know what Ah’ve seen, what Ah can still see…” She calmed herself with an effort, swallowing hard. “Joe’s right. You were right, Remy, all along. If Ah’ve imprinted the Seven, then that makes me dangerous. Irene’s inside me; she could make me do anythin’. Ah have t’ be stopped.”
She tried to sit up, but Remy held her down.
“Non,” he said firmly. “No one’s goin’ to do anything to you, p’tit. Dere’s still some hope. Trust me, chere.”
She stared at him. “What d’you mean?”
“Dat Destiny herself doesn’t seem t’ know why she imprinted you,” he explained on a breath. Seeing her questioning look he sighed, then continued. “At least, dat’s what she told Joseph. When you imprinted her, Rogue, de imprint went too deep. Destiny has no powers anymore. She has no memories, and she has no way to see into de future. Everythin’ she had, dey’re all inside you.” He paused, seeing her both horrified and enlightened by his words. “Rogue, whatever de truth about all dis, de answers lie in you. Perhaps Destiny the X-Ternal believes that she had you imprint her because she wanted you to be a pawn in dis whole crazy plan t’ take over de Timestream. But maybe de real Destiny had you imprint her for entirely different reasons.”
“For what possible reasons?” Rogue whispered, her mind suddenly reeling.
“De answers are wit’ you, chere,” he answered. “An’ if you can’t find them… Den de only place we’ll have left to look in are de Diaries.”
Rogue was silent, understanding now the terrible importance of her role in all this. She was the key to something she couldn’t yet comprehend, and she was standing, alone and on the edge, faced with a decision that could tip the scales that held the fate of the world. Fate. Now she alone held it in her hands, and only she could prevent that fate from leading to a future moulded to the whims of a power-hungry X-Ternal.
Rogue had to live. She had to remember.
“Ah have t’ find out the truth,” she said suddenly.
“Rogue,” Remy began warningly. “You know what dat could involve. All dat trauma – and so soon after you had t’ go through what happened wit’ Carol Danvers, wit’ Fontanelle and Sage’s therapy. Are you sure your mind can handle it?”
“Ah don’t have a choice, Remy,” she replied wearily, passing a hand over her forehead. “If Ah don’t remember, how can Ah know what Destiny saw in this future? How can Ah know how t’ stop her?”
He shook his head firmly. “Non, Rogue. You do have choice. Dat’s what dis has all been about from de start.” He stopped, sighing heavily, his gaze intense as his fingers curled tightly about her hands. “I don’t want t’ lose you, Rogue. Please don’t turn me away again. We’ve got t’ get through dis t’gether.”
If it had been a year ago she would have protested; she would have kept him at a distance for fear of what she might do to him. But now she had learnt from her mistakes; she knew that she needed him, that the pain of their separation would only make things all the more torturous to her. And moreover, she was determined to keep him by her side, to prevent him at all costs from becoming the thing she saw in her dreams. So she nodded.
“Ah promised you last night Ah wasn’t ever gonna leave you,” she murmured. “Wouldn’t make me a good girlfriend if Ah broke that promise so soon after Ah made it, would it?”
He conceded a small smile, pressing her hand against his lips. They remained in that position for a long while, as if to gain some untold strength from the other.
“It wasn’t a dream,” he muttered softly against her hand. “None of it was a dream. It was really you. You really came t’ me.”
“It wasn’t me,” she corrected him quietly, her voice laced with regret. “It was Irene.”
His red eyes perused her intently over their joined hands, his expression suddenly calm.
“It doesn’t matter, chere. It doesn’t change de most important t’ing.” He reached out, his hand settling lightly against her cheek, his face now wistful, now soft. “Dat I’m inside you now, Rogue. And I always will be.”